Monday, June 16, 2014

Damn being a fatty

     I have not been in single digit sized clothing since my early teens but have tried off and on to be that thin girl I wanted to look like. Yes, almost all my tries were half-assed thanks for pointing that out dick but as I am moving towards what I consider adulthood, the 20's are for playing and the 30's are to be adult well an adult at times if need be and no other adult is in the room to supervisor, I know that my body is going to be less and less forgiving and if I do get to a healthy weight and to my goal size my next endeavor will be to get to my financial goal for the surgery I am going to need for my slagging boobs and extra skinned tummy.
     Yes, starting a new diet is hard but for me that has always been pretty easy. I mean I could start four diets or health regimes in one day and plan the whole thing down to the calorie but that damn bitch follow through is always walking away when I need her ass to back me you. She came through once but backed out only 2 pant sizes away for my dream size.
    I am now back on the wagon and watching shows that make me want to look good for my wedding, don't judge my say yes to the dress asshole. While doing so I am doing 200 squats or chugging 100 oz of water, half what I believe my weight to be and this is not a new adventure I got out gluten a few months ago, my fiance is help for this because the weird mood swings and horrible panic attacks are all but gone until I eat a piece of pizza, damn weakness, still I am not see the results like the last time. The kicker is the diet I know but I was living, used so loosely, on 1200 kcal a day and only awake to do my squats while cooking for dinner or at work. It was a killer.
   I will soldier for now as this fat chick but by God, even if I am not a fan of his, I will get to my goal weight and size, and yes I know sizes differ and that size does not tell fitness level and such, before my dream wedding. 

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